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Wow. What a Long Post.

Posted by on May 20, 2004

So, it’s like, there’s finally a lot to say, and I wanna say it all.
First things first, tomorrow, friday the 21st i have my physical at Ford at 8 am. Apparently my getting hired at this point is all but a certainty. This is Good. As I recall, pay is in the neighborhood of $13/ hr which is pretty good for someone of my stature, i suppose. It still bothers me (rightly so) that i am near the four year anniversary of my high school graduation, and i have no job to speak of, no marketable skills, and only 8 completed college credit hours. So much for that potential everyone said i had all through my previous school career. Anyway, the Ford thing looks good, and I hope it won’t interfere with my other business opportunity: the Magic shop Vroman and i are opening somewhere within the next few months. This may turn out to be a career, though i find that thought rather depressing. At best it is an income for now, which is how i can describe most of my pastimes during the previous 4 years.

Next there is the housing thing. I have known nick and been close to him almost steadily for the past 9 years. The only time i have had less than monthly communication with him was at the tail end of HS when he went to Hazelwood, and then that following fall when he went off to SEMO and i got a job. He has his failings, but he is still one of my favorite people ever, and i am glad that we have been living together for the past year and a half.
Found out last weekend he’s moving out in 2 weeks.

I’m worried that i may not see him much, and that we may actually be growing apart for once, me with work at Ford, The Magic shop, living several miles away, and hopefully, school. I guess it won’t matter much in the grand scheme of things, but i hope i will have leave to visit him often. Showing up in person has always been the best way to keep in touch with him.

It’s looking very much like Vroman and I will be moving in to this house owned by his parents or grandparents, i’m not sure which. Either way, it needs a lot of work to pass code, or whatever, and if we fix it it looks like we may be able to stay there rent free, which will look very good for my bank account. The house exists in Kirkwood, just off manchester, down just a short way from where the shop will most likely be(the shop is actually in Webster Groves i think).

Last night i helped nick with a paper of his for his interpersonal communications class. I genuinely enjoyed helping him reword and reshape parts of it to make it better, and i’m really sorry that i have missed so much of that in college. Every time i talk to someone about something they’re working on for school and discover i know more about i than the person in the class, i always feel regret, like if i had done what i was supposed to, i could have gotten good grades in those classes and maybe been a tutor. I really like the idea of me as a tutor.

The guitar is coming along. I’m not playing as much as i should, but i’m having a good time with it. The opening bass line from “otherside” by RHCP is kinda hard to play, but i like the challenge. I’m also learning a few other VERY simple songs.

Saturday I went to three seperate “parties.” Things nick’s friends call “gatherings.”
I closed the shop early, as i am often instructed to do, at around 6 and went to Ogre’s house where he was having his 22nd birthday party. Not many people showed there, but Robert Shelli began to drink, so that was pretty fun. Then we went over to marc nolan’s house because there was another party there, but it turned out to be just something like a dozen people drinking and hanging out. I was there for a while. Then I came home and Fat John was here(he’s not fat at all anymore since he became a big herbivore, but it’s still fin to mock) watching tv with Nick. I went to my room and proceeded to begin the laundry, and when I came back, Andy and someone else(can’t remember) were here. Andy demanded that I go to Steve’s, where there is much DDRing because Steve has a hard pad. Andy wanted to see what I was capable of, I think, after so much of nick saying “oh yeah, he used to play it in the basement ALL THE TIME.” Which isn’t really a truthful thing to say, it’s just another one of his exaggerations. Now, at this point it’s about three in the morning, and I need to open the shop in nine hours, and I am still hoping for about eight good hours of sleep. Nevertheless, jonesing for a DDR fix (which I haven’t had since around the time Christine broke up with me) I agree to go, and plan on about 4 hours of sleep.
Surprisingly to all, including myself, I kicked ass at the Dancedancing. I’m totally out of shape and way past tired, but i still have plenty of talent and I danced Andy under the table. I knew I was out of shape mentally and physically and had played better than I did then, many times in the past, and i mentioned that which earned some ego-stroking to the tune of “So you used to like max combo on Maxx300, right?” I was flattered, knowing i was never quite that good. I also mentioned a couple of times how i hadn’t done that in months and Andy remembered the following day that he forgot to tell me “fuck you” for dancing so much better than him after not having played in a while. Either way. . .

Oh God. Nick just got home, and is now watching his STUPID transformers dvds which are assailing my ears, as his is the only computer hooked up to internet and so i must be in his room with the STUPID transformers to type my post. Lame.

Pretty much the only other thing I planned to write about is how I have decided, after months of pining, not to try to get another girlfriend. I don’t have the time, and I don’t even really see the point anymore. Sure it sates emotional turmoil for a time, but it always ends the same and I don’t think I even need that right now. I think I’ll feel better if I just ignore that part of my mind for a good long while. There’s a lot that went into this decision and in the end, sex is just not worth all the mindfuck I end up dealing myself. Ever seen the movie “streets of NY”?

Sweet sons of a motherless goat. this transformer dialog is pure trite. More than meets the eye my left foot.

Back to what I was saying. I was going to say something about the groundhog day phenomenon here, but i distracted myself with Super Smash Bros. Melee after typing the sentence before this one. Now i will talk about that.

Well, I want this to be about how I fancy myself VERY good at the original smash brothers for N64, and how I am awful at the new one for gamecube, but I think it’s actualy going to be about my competitive streak. You see, it is extremely important to me that I win. No matter the game, I hate to lose. There are occasions when losing is ok to me, but only when I feel I am outclassed by an opponent with a ridiculous amount of experience on me. No, on second thought, I pretty much only like losing to people I feel strategically inferior to, as I mentioned in my quiz. Losing is very frustrating for me when it is to an opponent whom I hold in any sort of contempt. Which returns me to smash brothers. In the original, I was very practiced and felt that my tactics would beat nearly any opponent, which turned out to be mostly true. however, this is not the case in the new game. It is SO different. The controls are slightly different, all the characters are more complex with a lot more balance to the power of their moves, and when Nick beats me at it, for some reason it bothers me. It’s kind of like when I beat Ogre at chess. ne game is ok, but when the victories start racking up in a very lopsided manner, one person begins to feel as if they are being toyed with as though they were a meal for a vastly superior predatory animal, before the feeding commences.

Wew. What a digression. Search google for “cat fan movie”. Funny clip. I recommend it. Not sure what else to say. There’s laundry to be done and ddr to be played yet, before I rest up for my physical tomorrow. guess I’ll sign off now.

Wow. What a Long Post.

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